Are you being Judgmental?
This is a continuation of our series on achieving success. Many of us are plagued with habits that keep us from being the best that we can be in our job, our career, or in life. Say Hello, Wave Goodbye!™ is an innovative coaching approach that removes those destructive habits and allows you to move forward and gain success. This series of blogs addresses the 12 most common habits that hold you back. They are called Core Dynamics of Common Problems™, which are excerpted from my chapter in the book, Coaching for Success (2008). You’ll learn why you are stuck and how the removal of these dynamics will set you free to pursue your goals. Last time we covered Disregarding Your Instincts. This issue will cover Being Judgmental.
3. Being Judgmental.
When we judge something or someone, we’re distancing ourselves by attempting to create a feeling of being separate from it. We might say, “Hey, I’m not like that.” However, in reality, the things we judge often reflect a part of ourselves that for some reason we don’t want to acknowledge. We find, for example, that when we don’t have any kind of charge about something, we feel neutral toward it, so we’re not judging it. But, if something is causing us to feel uncomfortable, we have a habit of avoiding issues that we really probably need to address or resolve within ourselves.
Interestingly, when this is present, we are often hardest on ourselves. We don’t try things because we don’t want others to judge us as we would judge others. This can paralyze us from moving forward because we want to be perfect. When we don’t have this issue, we feel that everything we experience is a part of us and we acknowledge and embrace it. In business, this gives us the courage to depart from convention, try new things, and fearlessly move forward.
Stay tuned for #4: Getting Distracted